We were all brought up in a certain ways. Adults telling us how we should live our life, how we should behave in public or what profession should we take on when we grow up.

Seeds of the only way to success in the eyes of the society were planted in us. But are that way the only way? If we can’t go that way, does that mean we are set for failure?

As children, we are told to study and do well in exam. Why? So that when we grow up, we can have a good job, a good pay, and our life is set for success. Become a doctor, lawyer or accountant and you can have security in life. No doubt this is one way to a good life, but not the only way.

A mother was worried about her son’s major exam. Her son is not the studious type, he is street smart but not book smart. He won’t go hungry when being thrown on streets but he will be bored to death in classroom. It’s obvious this boy is not suitable for classroom style learning. He’ll probably won’t do well for his exam.

But the mum was so worry, saying if he didn’t do well for this major exam, he can’t go anywhere. Without a certificate, what else can he do.

Unfortunately the mum sees that getting a certificate is the only way to success. Without it is doom. And actually how many people in the world are blinded by this myth. Many people in this world can’t see other alternatives. Roads towards success are numerous. Having a certificate is only one of these roads, but many thought this is the only road.

Many, many examples of successful people around the world came from humble background without a certificate. But why are they enjoying extreme success, some are enjoying success more than those who got high quality certificate?

Because they are doing what they love. They dump all that hot passion into their work. Compare to those who pursued certificates, many are doing what someone else love. There is no passion in work.

A friend who is working as a business development manager in a property management company told me one day that he really enjoys interior designing. So why don’t he change? He said then all his years in this company will be wasted. That is true, but he doesn’t enjoy it, why struggle in it.

If you are stuck in your job, struggling, asking what’s next? Find out what you really love and pursue it. Your friends and family may say you are crazy to quit your job or pursue something that’s  full of uncertainties. You must ask yourself, who do you live for? You live for no one else but yourself. You are responsible for your life and happiness.

Don’t let someone else tell you what you can do or cannot do. If you are finding misery in what you are doing now, declare it. Make that change. Do something that really resonate with your heart. Follow your heart, not someone else’s heart. Others just want you to conform to what the majority do. Are you going to conform to something that is not you?

We all made the mistake of living in someone else’s dream. Right now, you got to live in your dream! Do not make the mistake again!

A video of Sir Ken Robinson. This is exactly what I’m talking about.

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• Happiness: A Theory — How to Pursue Happiness (ehard.wordpress.com)

Someone said this before, the only constant in life is change itself.

The world is constantly changing. System, technology, organization and people are changing everyday and every hour. All these changes are bringing the world forward, improving our lives and making our system more efficient.

The most important change that should happen is within us. The mother of all change is YOURSELF!  What is going to happen when you remains stagnant? Nothing!

It can be scary when you are not changing, but the rest of the world doesn’t stop changing. The rest of the world moves on. Imprison yourself for ten years. Walk out of your cell, you will discover everything changes, even your friends and love ones.

So if there is a need to change, why some refuse to change?

Because of FEAR! Changes means rocking the boat. It creates uncertainties. Find support from friends who are willing to support you in. Sometimes a word of encouragement will do the job. Other times you may need a kick at the butt. Not to worry, as long as the change is with good intention, all will turn out well.

What must you do so change can occur?

For change to occur, awareness must be present. Awareness of the gap, awareness of self. Knowing there is a gap, then you can make change.

Few things you can do to reach awareness.

1. Reading
2. Meeting mentors
3. Attending workshops, seminars and programs
4. Have Mastermind group
5. Travel the world

The above few activities helps you to reach an awareness of the gap.

What can you change today that can improve your results tomorrow?

Did you ever dream of doing something so big that your hair are standing? Did you ever imagine yourself doing one grand thing that your heartbeat jump by 1 beat faster?

Recently, I’ve been imagining how would it feel to speak in front of 5000 audiences. I can feel the electric pulse passing my body when I thought of it.

On the other hand, there is this little voice in me, the voice of doubt that speaks to me. “Who are you to speak to 5000 people?” Does it happened to you? A voice telling you that you can’t do it, questioning you.

I know exactly that this is the self doubt in me that wants to stop me from growing. It wants me to be safe, staying in my comfort zone. Everyone of us has this voice of doubt. All it want to do is to keep you safe from danger and pain. It is good to be out of danger, but sacrificial of wealth and growth is required.

However, I love risk. It makes my life exciting and adventurous. I know I have to grow to reach so that one day I can speak to 5000 people. To grow requires me to step on the edge.

Imagine you stepping at the edge. Looking down, you see an endless fall. You can turn around and walk away, going back to your shell. Or you can take one step to make a jump to experience the feeling of free fall, and at the end of the fall you’ll find a paradise.

Yes, you will always find a paradise.

For 7 years, after starting my business, I’ve always been on the edge, getting myself uncomfortable. And I always find a paradise.

New year, new goals. How many of you set out to achieve some goals in 2010? Actually only 10% of the people set goals. But if you are reading this, you are probably one of the 10%.

In this 10% who set goals, there are only a handful who achieved them. Why is that so? When one set goals, don’t they want to achieve them? Why is it many didn’t achieve what they set out to do?

Overwhelm By The Goals
To achieve your goals there is a need to step out of comfort zone. It’s something not everyone likes to do because we don’t like to feel uncomfortable. Some realize that they have to get very uncomfortable to achieve their goals.

For example someone who sets a goal to achieve an 50% increment in income has to get really uncomfortable. In his normal job, most likely he couldn’t achieve that, so he will have to start a part-time business. He has to do something very differently. He has to learn new skills, more tasks is waiting for him, take up more of his time. With many new challenges awaiting, many are unwilling to move out of their comfort zone.

Beaten By Life

Some moved out of their comfort zone. They started strong with lots of zest and enthusiasm. However along the way life threw them a curve ball. They couldn’t manage it, beaten by it, decided to move back to their comfort zone.

Some of my friends are in this category. They move out of their comfort zone with the optimistic of generating good money with their new businesses. But life keeps throwing punches at them, wanting to knock them out. Eventually they allow to be knocked out, moving back and accepting what life offers them.

There must be an easier way to achieve your goals. And there is an easier way. My recent distinction in achieving goals is to break your goals up. There’s a saying, how do you eat an elephant? Taking small bites.

I’m blessed with opportunities to grow in the new year. Which means I’m blessed with lots of task to complete. Take for example one of my goal this year is to write a new book. I announced to my good friends that I’m going to complete Chapter 1 of the book within a month.

It can be easy and difficult at the same time. If I would have leave it till the last week of the month, it will be difficult. Well, I didn’t leave it till the last week. I started writing the moment I announced it publicly. The plan is to write 1.5 pages daily, so by 20 days I have a chapter.

This makes it so much easier. Rather than forcing myself to write 6-7 pages at a go, I just have to write 1-2 pages a day, which is achievable.

Now I apply it to all my tasks. Set a deadline, then break it up to daily task. In this way, not only it will be easier to achieve your goals, it will also build your confidence. Because if you keep on your task daily, you know that you are moving forward in achieving your goals. By doing so, your spirit will feel good.

Break down your goals to daily task, or even hourly if need to. You can have a higher chance to achieve your goals by breaking them down. Use this method on one of your simple goals, give it a shot and observe the result.

Happiness is something many are after. Everything that most people do is to lead them to happiness. So how to be happy?

First we have to definite what is happiness? By the definition in the dictionary, happiness means showing or feeling pleasure or contentment. Happiness is a feeling, an emotion. From that feeling of happiness, you will show it in your physical form; like a smile or huge laughter.

The most usual way of achieving happiness is to own material possessions. By the way we purchased material possession, it seems that the more material possessions we own, the happier we are. Is that true?

Your answer will probably be “NO”. Most likely, 99% of us will say “NO” too. But ask yourself, really ask yourself, why do you want to chase after newer products, better cars, bigger house?

When I got my first BMW, I felt great! It was an amazing feeling. It was the feeling of pleasure – happiness. One month later, that feeling subsided. No longer I felt excitement, pleasure and contentment when I drove that car.

But I want to have that feeling. I want to feel great! By the 2nd month, I was thinking which will be my next car. Does it mean that the current car is hopeless? No, it’s still functional, fulfilling it duty of moving me around. Why do I want to change it? It got nothing to do with the car or the car advertisements. Something in me changed.

I’m searching for the feeling of pleasure and contentment. Purchasing new things got me those feelings. But once the feeling subside, I have to buy new things have that feeling again. This doesn’t happen to me only, this happen to 99% of the population.

To make matter worse, all the advertisers are making you think that way. Having a Mercedes Benz makes you feel different from the rest, feels pleasure, feels satisfied. So we are brought up thinking by having more, we are happier.

Now, that’s a lie. A big fat lie that we believe. Some of you may say that you don’t buy into this lie. But look at your action. The wardrobe is full yet you are adding new clothes into it. The shoe shelf is packed, yet you continue your conquest of new shoes. We bought into this lie consciously or unconsciously.

This is never going to end unless you have the awareness. The awareness of creating the feeling of pleasure and contentment from within.

I was observing my nephew who is one year old smiling and laughing without any external help. He can be walking unstably, talking to himself and yelling in joy. He can be coming into my room, looking at me and smile.

A baby knows where to find happiness. You were baby once, so you know where to find happiness. It’s inside of you. All the feelings that you are looking for are inside of you. Over the years of education, all those feelings was buried.

Start by saying thank you for being alive. Your life itself is a happiness. There are many at the mortuary who are willing to exchange place with you.

You do not have to wait till you achieve your goals or purchase some dream house to be happy.
What if you can’t achieve it? Does it means you can never be happy? In actual fact, you can be happy, right now!

Look around you, look at all the things that you own. Aren’t they a blessing already? When you start looking at those blessings, you can feel the feeling of pleasure and contentment. Isn’t that happiness?

Happiness is always in you. It’s always inside, deep within. The moment you find happiness in you, that’s the moment you stop becoming a slave to material possessions.

It has been a while since my last post. I had been distracted by many things that’s happening, didn’t find the motivation and inspiration to write anything here. Until recently, a friend told me that I’ve not been adding new post here. I realized there are some followers to this blog.

The intention of having this blog was to inspire humanity, adding values to people’s life. This intention is also the purpose of my life. Though I am not deviant from this purpose, (by conducting Youth Success Boot Camp & promoting Money and You Program) I admit I was not giving justice to this blog. And now I promise to write more frequently here.

Since we are coming to the end of the year. You may want to slow down during this festive season to reflect how have your life been in the year 2009.

Slowing down to reflect can give you a whole new perspective of your life. It give you clarity of who you are, what have you done; it probably humanize you.

Reflecting upon the beginning of the year and now, those mistakes you made, the goals you achieved, who have you become, what have changed. You probably can find glimpses of the 2009 experiences.

We are traveling at high speed in our daily life. Everything is moving so fast since January. Working hard, completing tasks, meeting deadlines, fire-fighting, job hopping.

To make matter worse, the economy crisis at its lowest point filled our life with uncertainties and insecurities. Some are worried about their job, some have no job.

Let’s just slow down to look at our lives for the past one year. You may want to do this before you reflect back. Step out of your body, look at your past as a third party observing all incident, challenges, successes.

Few things is going to happen when you become an observer.

1. Problems become smaller. When you step out to observe instead of being in the problems, they become insignificant compared to your whole life. The problem is just taking up a small part in your life. And I learned a new phase recently, “This too will pass.”

2. Gain insights. Reflecting all the incidents helps you see the bigger picture in life. Your daily life consists of good and bad things, and most of the time you remembered the bad things that happened. But when you look at the bigger picture, you may see those bad things may turn out to be good now. When you see yourself improved, those bad things may be that turning point, that moment to make you stronger.

3. In touch with yourself. Reflecting helps to get in touch with yourself. Feel your feelings. Our daily lives are so busy that we forgot to feel. Slowing down is a great way to feel that peace and love within us. It helps us remember that we are human being.

4. In touch with others. This is a great opportunity to find out whom we had missed in this one year. Who are the great friends that we lost or forgot? Is it time to get connected with them again? The wonderful thing about human is to get connected with people around us.

5. Clarity for the future. This helps us set pace of the next year plan. New resolution to achieve. Anyone without a resolution or goal is blind, like a ship in the ocean without direction, floating aimlessly. Slowing down gets us to think forward. How to go forward?

Take sometime off to do a reflection. It can be 2 hours, 4 hours or a day. The most important thing in this process is it humanize you.

From a toddler learning to stand with our both legs, we have been falling. Though it hurt when we fell, that’s how we be able to stand firmly in the end. From standing to walking, we fell again. But that’s how we got to walk in the end. Then when we grow up, we learn how to cycle. And we fall again…

It seems like we are destined to fall in stages of our life. It hurt like hell, but it strengthen us. We learned what not to do next time so as to avoid the pain. That’s how we grow. Recently, I read in a book that discussed falling:

If You Didn’t Fall
You Didn’t Get Any Better
If You Are Going To Get Better
You Have To Push Yourself
If You Push Yourself
You Are Going To Fall

Isn’t this so true? Whenever we are going to move on to the next stage, to become better, we fall. We learn from the falling, becoming better after the fall. Thomas Edison fell a thousand times before he invented light bulb. He became better after each fall, he learned what didn’t work after each fall.

No matter how hard the fall is, you will be able to pick yourself up. But some decides to remain fallen and beaten. They decide to give in to the fall, never ever rise again. It’s not about the fall, it’s what you do after the fall. Successful people probably fell many more times but they always pick themselves up.

President Lincoln is one of the greatest failure in human history before he became President. He lost his wife, mind, business and money. He lost many times in election, and the final one, he was made the President of United States. He never give in to those falls. Probably those falls made him a better person which resulted in being one of the better Presidents in America history.

The sad thing is I’ve seen many friends giving in to the fall. They decided to stay in the comfort zone, not wanting to fall again. They seems to have forgotten that successful people stand up from the fall, never give in to what life presented to them.

Falling is only a process towards success. Without falling, one would never know how sweet success is. And if you are down under now, you have a choice. Remain there or rise, your choice!

A man saw a hot, beautiful woman across the street and thought, “if only my wife looked like her…”

Are there times when you saw your neighbour’s car and wished that you had the same car too? You wished to have your friend’s job. The grass is always greener on the opposite, right? Admit it! You do have that thought! I do fell into it over and over again. But this morning, I had a different feeling.

Today, I woke up feeling incredibly great. I knew inside that things are going to change for the better. Now life has been trying to keep me down on my knees for the past few weeks. But I’m not going to let it. The past weeks I have been fighting to get back up, but finding life knocked me down again. But this morning, it was different. I no longer fighting to get back up, instead I gave thanks for all that happened. Right away I felt much lighter.

Have you been complaining about bad things that happened to you? If you can fully understand this statement, “Everything happens for a reason,” you can overcome many bad things. There are many explanation:

“The Universe wants to test you.”
“The Universe is telling you something.”
“The Universe is giving you sign.”
“The Universe is protecting you.”

For example, 3 months ago when I fractured my ankle, I had so much to say. I can’t do this, I can’t do that, it disrupt my schedule etc. When I looked at that statement, “Everything happens for a reason,” maybe it was really telling me something. I can think of 10 reasons why that happened to me, but seriously I don’t know. One of those reasons was maybe the Universe wants me stop playing football for a while because my wedding is coming soon.

This morning I gave thanks with every little things that I have, even those bad things that had happened; and I started to see things at a different angle. All those little things that the Universe had blessed me with.

Give yourself a chance to see this world in a different light. See those events that occurred around you from a different angle. Say, “I give thanks because…”

1. It makes me stronger.
2. It drives my desire.
3. It makes me understand more about myself.
4. I gain more knowledge now.
5. It opens more opportunities.

and many more.

You can be grateful for almost anything. If you are reading this post right now, be grateful that you chanced upon this post.

Look out of your window, if you see flowers or trees, be grateful that you are alive in this world to see the beauty of them.

Be grateful that you are breathing, there are some who can’t breath naturally. You’ll see life in a much lighter manner.

Now, I’m grateful that you are reading this. Thank you.

Are there times when you feel stuck in life? You just feel that whichever decision you make is not the best decision. Every path is fill with uncertainty. To make matter worse, doing nothing is definitely not the best decision. In fact, you are force to do something, but you don’t know what to do.

I felt this way recently. It was not a good place to be in. Knowing that I have to do something, yet the path in front is dark. Any wrong decision can bring me back to zero. I wish I can remain there motionless, but staying in the same spot is disaster as well. I was perturbated to the wall.

If you ever face with this situation, what will you do?

When you are really stuck in situation like this, the only thing you can do is to DO SOMETHING. It doesn’t matter what you do, but do something, do anything.

Situation may get worse when you do something. However, if you don’t do anything, situation will get worse too. As I agree situation may get worse, it may get better. But you wouldn’t know which side it will fall unless you do something, isn’t it?

Since there is a chance that things may get worse, by elimination method you will find out that certain action didn’t work.

A month ago I placed an advertisement in newspaper. Uncertainty arise because I didn’t know if it can create the expected responses. Fear and doubt surrounded me as it may be a wrong decision. And true enough it was a wrong decision.

I learned something through this experience. In Master Your Mind, Design Your Destiny it mentioned that successful people also failed many times. But they did correction to their failures, to achieve success. It also stated that failures are only feedback to our strategy.

I had to place an advertisement again the following week. But I was so afraid that it will be a waste of money again. If I don’t do it, I’m screwed. If I do it and didn’t get the response, I screwed too. I made some correction, and placed the advertisement again.

This time, I had responses. I thought I’ve gotten the right formula, but the following week again, the responses dropped, and it was money down the drain again.

Right now I have not found the right formula yet. If I stopped, I will never find the right formula. Continue to do something is the only way out, although I’m not sure if what I do is correct. All I know is to continue receiving feedback and making correction just like what Master Your Mind, Design Your Destiny has taught me.

Also, doing something is like throwing a stone in a pond. It will create a ripple that will affect the rest of the pond. Doing something creates a ripple effect to the Universe that may create something unexpected for you though you may not know what can it create.

You may be despair and stuck in life, most importantly is to do something, do anything to get out of your situation.

Click Here if you want to find out how Master Your Mind, Design Your Destiny can help you to achieve your goals.

Are there times when the going got so tough that you had the intention to give up? I had. Walking away from your dream to return to your old job or self seems to be so much easier. During challenging times, it seems like a natural thing to do; finding the easiest way out. Why go through those struggles?

Furthermore, there are so much uncertainties. “Am I guaranteed rewards at the end of those struggles?” “When is it going to end?” How many of us can predict the length of the tough times? It may only be the beginning. However, it can be coming to an end. The problem is we don’t know.

Recently I went through one of those moments. Devastated, demoralized, discouraged – why they all start with ‘D’?

We placed an advertisement to promote our new program, Youth Success Boot Camp. Venue booked. The result, a Big Fat Zero response. Why do I need to go through this? While I wanted to add value, I was put through this struggle.

Is this a test from the Universe? Or is it a sign to give up? Maybe I’m not suppose to walk down this path. Seriously, doubt was flowing in my blood. If I knew between test or sign, it will make life so much easier. But I guess that’s life, turning and twisting made you guess along the way.

I decided with my partner that it was a test. We decided to push on one last drive. Maybe success is round the corner. Maybe we are at the end of the struggle. We made calls to the media company, placing another advertisement.

Then a miracle happened. Before the new advertisement is out, which is tomorrow, we already had 20 parents registered for the seminar. I am looking forward to the result of the new advertisement now.

If I were to give up after the first advertisement, I would not have these 20 parents. I would not have experience the miracles of the Great Spirit.

It has been written in so many books, sometimes success is just round the corner. Continue on the journey that was meant for you, success will definitely find you.

A great lesson I got is to have someone who can share that vision of yours. It can be one person or a group. Going through tough times alone can be really tough. Fortunately for me, my wife whose also my business partner is there to share. Knowing that someone is there to support greatly helps the spirit.

I had a distinction on those tough times. It was the tough times that made the good times sweet. When the parents emailed us one by one, my excitement went up inch by inch. Every parent who registered is such a gem to us. I started to appreciate every single person who’s coming to the seminar.

So if you are facing a challenging time of your life, know this – all challenges are there so that victory wil taste sweeter.