Inspiration Junction

Sometimes, when all our doubts, fears and insecurities wrap ourselves up, we always come up with the idea of “I wish I was somebody else.” More often than not, we think and believe that someone or rather, most people are better than us.- when in reality, the fact is, most people are more scared than us.

You spot a totally eye-catching girl sitting by herself at a party, casually sipping on a glass of Martini. You think to yourself, “she looks so perfectly calm and confident.” But if you could read through her transparent mind, you would see a bunch of clouds of thoughts and you might just be amazed that she’s thinking “are people talking about why I am seated here alone?… Why don’t guys find me attractive? …I don’t like my ankles, they look too skinny… I wish I was as intelligent as my best friend.”

We look at a young business entrepreneur and say “Wooh… what else could he ask for?” He stares at himself at the mirror and murmur to himself, “I hate my big eyes… I wonder why my friends won’t talk to me… I hope mom and dad would still work things out.”

Isn’t it funny? We look at other people, envy them for looking so outrageously perfect and wish we could trade places with them, while they look at us and thinks of the same thing. We are insecure of other people who themselves are insecure of us. We suffer from low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence and lose hope in self improvement because we are enveloped in quiet desperation.

Sometimes, you notice that you have an irritating habit like biting off your finger nails, having a foul mouth, and you – of all people, is the last to know.

I have a friend who never gets tired of talking. And in most conversations, she is the only one who seems to be interested in the things she has to say. So all of our other friends tend to avoid the circles whenever she’s around, and she doesn’t notices how badly she became socially handicapped – gradually affecting the people in her environment.

One key to self improvement is to LISTEN and TALK to a trusted friend. Find someone who you find comfort in opening up with even the most gentle topics you want to discuss. Ask questions like “do you think I am ill-mannered?”, “Do I always sound so argumentative?”, “Do I talk too loud?”, “Does my breath smell?”, “Do I ever bore you when were together?”. In this way, the other person will obviously know that you are interested in the process of self improvement. Lend her your ears for comments and criticisms and don’t give her answers like “Don’t exaggerate! That’s just the way I am!” Open up your mind and heart as well. And in return, you may want to help your friend with constructive criticism that will also help her improve her self.

One of Whitney Houston’s songs says “Learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all.” True enough. In order to love others, you must love yourself too. Remember, you cannot give what you do not have.

Before telling other people some ways on how to improve themselves, let them see that you yourself is a representation and a product of self improvement. Self improvement makes us better people, we then inspire other people, and then the rest of the world will follow.

Stop thinking of yourselves as second-rate beings. Forget the repetitive thought of “If only I was richer… if only I was thinner” and so on. Accepting your true self is the first step to self improvement. We need to stop comparing ourselves to others only to find out at the end that we’ve got 10 more reasons to envy them.

We all have our insecurities. Nobody is perfect. We always wish we had better things, better features, better body parts, etc. But life need not be perfect for people to be happy about themselves. Self improvement and loving yourself is not a matter of shouting to the whole world that you are perfect and you are the best. It’s the virtue of acceptance and contentment. When we begin to improve ourselves, we then begin to feel contented and happy.

Look at the world around you. Look at the circumstances, the events, and the people in your life. All of this is nothing more than a projection of your inner being. The outside world is an illusion. A big, beautiful, complex illusion, but an illusion nonetheless. In this illusion you can see, smell, taste, hear, and feel. You can feel excruciating pain, indescribable ecstasy, and just about anything in between. The illusion is as real as you want it to be. It won’t stop just because you recognize it as an illusion.

Ironically, the reality is within you, not outside of you. All of the pain, pleasure, joy, love and everything else you can imagine is within your very being. You’ve always heard people say, “The answers are within you”, right? Well, they truly are! After birth, we spend most of our time acclimating to this external environment in which we seem to live. No wonder it is so difficult to perceive our internal realities – we have focused for years exclusively on the external. We look for our answers outside of ourselves, in books, people, and events. Little do we realize that the external events and information that we come across is being generated from within ourselves.

But what value comes from recognizing the external world as illusion and acknowledging the internal world? The external world, at least to the extent of our current understanding, is very real. Every day we see, smell, hear, taste, and feel all of the sensations that our external world has to offer. We can touch the objects and feel them, how can that not be real? And more so, if it isn’t real, does it even matter? We seem to be stuck in this reality anyway.

The important thing is to realize that everything comes from within. All of the answers you need are within you. You will continue living in the world of maya, but learning to access your inner being is of utmost importance. Instead of seeking, seeking, seeking outside of yourself, you need to learn to meditate deeply. You need to learn to shut off your mind, which is little more than a very noisy distraction that keeps you cemented firmly in the physical illusion. Once you are able to quiet that beast, you will begin to experience your internal universe, which is full of far more wonder than even the external. You can find the answers to all of your questions, the answers to your very desires, inside yourself. You can receive guidance, advice, and instruction.

That’s the part that is important – learning to turn within. Your external life will be greatly enhanced as you connect to your inner reality, as the external reality is nothing but a projection of your inner worlds. Learn to still your mind, look within, and re-connect with your true spirit, which is infinite, all-knowing and all-permeating. You can also begin to see the external world more as it truly is, and the infinite possibilities will become more apparent. The more you recognize the illusory nature of the external world, the less you will feel bound by the supposedly unbendable laws of nature. Good luck and happy inner seeking!